The Meaning of Life: Part 2 Don't Get Caught by the Hustle

And I saw that all toil and all achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

Fools fold their hands
   and ruin themselves.
Better one handful with tranquility
   than two handfuls with toil
   and chasing after the wind. Eccl 4:4-6

Today’s Reading: Ecclesiastes 4-6; 2 Corinthians 12

If you look at media and popular culture there is at least one message that rings abundantly clear.

More is better!

Advertising has taught us that we won’t be happy unless we have more. We always need the next gadget, the big house, the fancy car. There is nothing wrong with nice things. As a matter of fact I happen to like nice things. I like them a lot. But having nice things isn’t the problem. The problem is when we assign personal value to obtaining these things.

Often times it is competitive. We look around at others and see their perceived wealth and think, man… why can’t I have that? And from these salty seeds the weeds of greed sprout, only to be watered all the more by the society that we live in. If only we can be richer than the Joneses then we will be BETTER than them too.

No one comes out and actually says this, but for most of us it is a latent motivation, deep within the parts of ourselves that we least like to face.

Ok don’t believe me? I’ll give you a perfect example. Marriage.

Oh no, I’m not talking about the obvious things like men wanting the most beautiful woman or women wanting the most successful man… I’m talking about the process of getting married.

That’s right… the engagement ring and the wedding.

The engagement is the proving ground of the man. De Beers and the rest of them folks have convinced us over the past several decades that diamonds are a girl’s best friend. They have convinced us that one must purchase a diamond ring as a display of their affection for their soon to be wife. Before it was always the ring that was the symbol right? The ring is the unending circle that signifies a commitment that will never be broken. But nowadays it is the diamond too. The bigger and clearer, the more he loves her. And everyone’s watching. The first mention of a woman being engaged is followed immediately by the question “oh so let’s see the ring…”

And if that ring ain’t up to “par” then it’s all bad. Too much pressure for a situation that should be so beautiful…

Then if you make it past the engagement hurdle, the wedding comes. Who are you going to invite? Where will it be? What dress will she wear? What food will the guests eat? We can’t sit uncle Rufus next to Aunt Maybell. We said we’d only invite 100 people but what about my second cousins on my momma’s side? They’ll be furious if they aren’t invited. Couples take out loans the size of down payments on would be homes so that they can please all of these other people and prove to them the largesse of their love.

And the coldest part of this hustle is that the whole purpose of this expression of love and commitment has vanished into an elaborate and expensive show and tell. There are countless couples who delay engagement because of their expectations for the kind of ring they should buy or how much the wedding will cost. Others assume crippling debt to keep up with the weddings that their friends and family had while still others, who try to do it within their means, get judged for the fiscal modesty of their displays of affection.

All of this for two special events that are supposed to be about love: the day a couple privately agree to commit themselves to each other for life, and the day that they share that commitment with their family and friends.

My point isn’t to expose the obvious hustle behind this whole industry. We all know what’s going on here. And my point is not to trash beautiful rings and weddings. I think it is wonderful when two people can share their love with each other and their loved ones in beautifully creative ways.

But at the end of the day it’s easy to lose focus. The focus should be on enjoying that present moment. It should be about planning every single day to share the best, most loving life together.

Don’t worry about what the next person is doing, or wearing, or driving. Just focus on the life that you live, the choices that you can make, and the joy that you can experience each and every day. Find work that fulfills your purpose, work that you enjoy, work that puts food in your family’s belly.

Everything else is nice and great but it’s not necessary. If you want it then by all means go for it!!! Enjoy the wonderful treasures that life has out there for us.

But do it for you. Do it because it is what YOU want, not because someone else is watching you or telling you how you should live your life.

Your life is yours. Seize the day! The present moment is all we are guaranteed. Never lose sight of that, and your days will be filled with joy. 

A Letter to Peter After the Fall

"You will all fall away," Jesus told them, "for it is written:
" 'I will strike the shepherd,
and the sheep will be scattered.' But after I have risen, I will go ahead of you into Galilee."
Peter declared, "Even if all fall away, I will not."
"I tell you the truth," Jesus answered, "today—yes, tonight—before the rooster crows twice you yourself will disown me three times."
But Peter insisted emphatically, "Even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you." And all the others said the same. Mark 14: 27-31


Hey Peter,

Sometimes you rub people the wrong way. I’ve heard folks talk about you. They talk about how you think you are so fresh and so clean. But you know what? I really like you.

I love how passionate you are about your feelings. I love how you continually strive to be the best that you can be. After all, that is probably part of the reason that Jesus gave you your new name. You are a solid rock.

How did it feel when Jesus told you that you would deny him? I’m sure it felt terrible. Here was the person that you loved and believed in more than anyone else in the world seeming to tell you that he didn’t believe in you.

That’s heart breaking.

But I suppose that it was no more heart breaking then when you actually denied him…

But this is why I love you man. You go balls to the walls. You expect the most from yourself and you try your best to deliver. And when you cannot come through, for whatever reason, you are devastated.

I’m trying to be more like you. I am finally matching the pace of my steps with the intensity of my heart.

This is the only way to live one’s dream.

So I’m just writing this to say thank you. Thank you for being as great in your mistakes as you are in your triumphs. Thanks for showing me that when you fall there is always a chance to get back up and to keep walking again.

Because that’s what life is anyway right? We crawl before we walk. We walk before we run. And the lucky ones some how figure out how to fly.

You flew even though you stumbled; and that gives me the courage to stretch my wings.


Sincerely,

Clarence


Today’s Reading: Deuteronomy 26-27; Mark 14: 27-53