Saturday, March 13, 2010

More Fun with the Laws



Ok… I’m reading entirely too many hilarious and thought provoking laws so… it’s time for another installment of legal commentary by Clarence Mitchell Bible Attorney at Law.

Enjoy.


“When you go to war against your enemies and see horses and chariots and an army greater than yours, do not be afraid of them, because the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt, will be with you…” – Deuteronomy 20:1

This is fresh. So at the beginning of my copy of the Art of War by Sun Tzu I will write “bring my faith in God to battle with me”. I like this.



“However, in the cities of the nations the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance, do not leave alive anything that breathes. Completely destroy them… Otherwise, they will teach you to follow all the detestable things they do in worshiping their gods, and you will sin against the LORD your God. – Deuteronomy 20: 16-18

Good gracious!!! Games are NOT being played not one bit.

Ok Here’s how we can flip it. There are many adversaries on the path of purpose; fear, doubt, insecurity… they must be eradicated when they surface otherwise they will cause us to stumble and fall.



“When you lay siege to a city for a long time, fighting against it to capture it, do not destroy its trees by putting an ax to them, because you can eat their fruit. Do not cut them down. Are the trees of the field people, that you should besiege them?” Deuteronomy 20: 19

Don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater. You know those people who “find God” or, all of the sudden, are super passionate about some dream or goal and totally cut all of the old people out of their lives?

That’s no bueno. We have all arrived at the present for good and bad reasons. Leave the bad but keep the good.



“When you go to war against your enemies and the LORD your God delivers them into your hands and you take captives, if you notice among the captives a beautiful woman and are attracted to her, you may take her as your wife. Bring her into your home and have her shave her head, trim her nails and put aside the clothes she was wearing when captured. After she has lived in your house and mourned her father and mother for a full month, then you may go to her and be her husband and she shall be your wife. If you are not pleased with her, let her go wherever she wishes. You must not sell her or treat her as a slave, since you have dishonored her. – Deuteronomy 21: 10-14

You KNOW homie is not feelin her after all of that. You’ve killed all the men in her life, taken her from her home and removed all the stuff that made her fly…

I’m sure her sparkling personality won’t shine through in a month’s time… but aside from this here’s my take:

When it comes to marrying anything in your life, person or purpose, strip away the decoration and look at what’s inside. Crap wrapped up in a pretty box with a pretty bow is still crap. It’s like fast food. It may taste good going down, but once it gets inside it will poison you.

And don’t blame anyone else for your mistake. You are responsible. Take your lumps as they may come.



They shall say to the elders, "This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a profligate and a drunkard." Then all the men of his town shall stone him to death. You must purge the evil from among you. All Israel will hear of it and be afraid.” Deuteronomy 21: 20-21

And y’all feel bad for that bad kid who got spanked in the grocery store. Little man got off easy.



“A woman must not wear men's clothing, nor a man wear women's clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this.” – Deuteronomy 22: 5

Hilarious! Isn’t “detest” just entirely too strong a word here? God must be FURIOUS during Halloween. But how does the Good Book go from that verse straight into this next one?



If you come across a bird's nest beside the road, either in a tree or on the ground, and the mother is sitting on the young or on the eggs, do not take the mother with the young. You may take the young, but be sure to let the mother go, so that it may go well with you and you may have a long life. – Deuteronomy 21: 6-7

This is profound. If you take the mother then the whole family dies. If you just take the eggs the mother can lay more eggs. This is a metaphor for life. Living things must perish for us to live. We need to take the time to respect and honor that sacrifice and be smart about it.

If we continue to recklessly destroy the world to satisfy our every whim we will be left with a world not fit for life. There will be no air to breathe or food to eat. The world will be here for a good long while. But will we be here to enjoy it? It is up to us to determine our fate.



Today’s Reading: Deuteronomy 20-22: Mark 13: 21-37

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